Mommy Jealousy

It seems like recently I've been reading a lot of confessions on blogs and I thought that I would follow in their footsteps and do a (brutally) honest post.

I have mommy jealousy.  It is so sad.  Really.  I know it's completely irrational and my thoughts are probably completely unfounded, but never the less I have jealousy issues when it comes to Sarah and other babies.  And just so you know, Sarah is the best baby ever born.  That is my opinion and I'm sticking to it!

For instance, there is another new mom that I see on a fairly normal basis.  She had a baby shortly after Sarah was born.  And, sad to say, but mommy jealousy sometimes rears it's ugly head.  When anyone asks to see pictures of her little girl and they don't ask about Sarah or ask me if I can remember Sarah being that small or making newborn noises, I want to shout "Of course I do ~ that was just last month!"  Like I get morbidly offended at the amount of time people spend gushing over another baby.  Not that Sarah isn't gushed over, because believe me she is.   And in the spirit of honesty these thoughts usually only pop up when another baby is around and Sarah is not.  Thereby making me miss her so much more!  Plus, being all proud mommy and whatnot, I want everyone to be delighted as she reaches milestones (well maybe not milestones so much as a new coo or face).  I want to show videos and bombard people with stories about her, whether the story is mildly interesting or not.  When the truth of the matter is, no one cares as much about my baby as I do (Mike being the exception).  I could spend all day, every day talking about Sarah and making speculations about what every noise and pattern could mean.  Others, think she's cute are polite in their nods and interests, but they don't want to talk about her 24/7.  What's wrong with these people!?!  Sarah is the cutest and smartest baby ever born! (I told you I am completely irrational and have very biased opinions) 

I probably shouldn't write a post about this as I'm opening myself up to lots and lots of criticism and judgement, but in the spirit of honesty, there are times when I have to check myself.  There have been times when I want to run to the bathroom and cry over why no one cares about my sweet girl (I know! Irrational and completely untrue!)  But then I think about it and would hate if other moms ran to the bathroom when I talk about Sarah because they think I don't care about their child.  These are just some of the dark and twisty thoughts that sometimes creep through my head.  I don't know if I'm the only one who feels this way or if every moms feels like this about their child.  But I do know that I don't want to feel like this and pray about it when a mommy jealousy streak strikes.  I have shared this with Mike and Bethany and they both just laughed at me and rolled their eyes.  I know I'm ridiculous, but c'mon ~ Sarah's awesome!  End of story.

11 Question Tag Up - Better Late than Never

So here's the deal, I was tagged in this post a couple of months ago right after I had Sarah.  I've had every intention of completing it, but like all blog posts in my head, it's managed to get away from me.  There are rules for this tag up, but I am breaking them as I don't have 11 blogging friends, and the blogging friends I do have only post sporadically and probably won't see this.  Jessica from TheParsonageFamily being the exception and the one who included me in this fun questionnaire.  So with that being said, in we go...

The Rules

~You must post the rules

~Post 11 fun facts about yourself

~Answer the 11 questions that the tagger posted for you;

then create 11 questions to ask the people you've tagged

~Tag 11 people and link them in your post

~Let them know you have tagged them

11 Fun Facts about Me:

1.  I love love LOVE to travel.  I love not only going new places, but the process of getting there.  I love road trips, airports, trains, buses, boats/ferries etc.  There's just something about travel days that I really really enjoy.  I also love staying in hotels and just being out of a "normal" routine for awhile.  I also want to do unique things when in a new place.

2.  My eyes are two different colors.  Or really, they're two different shades of hazel, but you can definitely tell.

3.  Pizza and Champagne or Asti are one of the BEST combinations ever.  I love the hot saltiness of the pizza coupled with the the cool sweetness of the champagne or Asti.  Plus pizza just calls for something with bubbles :)

4.  On a related note, I always eat the best tasting food on my plate last.  Therefore I always have a good taste to end on.

5.  I'm not into status symbols or material goods.  However, I'm still aware that some of my things may be sub-par.  For example, I drive a 96 Sable.  Not a bad car, I paid cash for it, it runs great, and gets me to where I need to be.  But if we were going to ride together somewhere and you have a shiny new car, I will always defer to you.  But, I'll offer to pay for all gas expenses, and probably pay for your meal or drink or whatever, so it almost works out...kinda...

6.  3 Men and a Little Lady is probably my all time favorite movie.  I have no idea why this is or what the draw is, but I love it!

7.  I'm scared of whales.  I haven't always been scared of these terrifying creatures, but it's developed over a series of dreams in my adult life.  They started around the time I went off the college and happen whenever I have a major life change approaching.  I had to have my sister play certain parts of a wii game (endless ocean) because there was a whale in the water with me... so NOT okay...

8.  I organize when I shop.  I'm that shopper that puts all of the nail polishes back in their proper place before selecting a color. Mostly I do this with display cases, but I have been known to size order a rack or refold t-shirts.  I always leave the store better than I found it.

9.  I heart boardgames or games in general.

10.  I love seeing peoples handwriting.  One of my favorite things to receive is a hand written note.  I think handwriting is so unique to the person.  I love seeing something and knowing just by looking at it who created it.  (And yes I think that handwriting something out is creating)

11.  I have an expansive Disney animated movie collection.  I don't do all the sequels (with the exception of Lion King 1 1/2 ~ if you haven't watched this one you are missing out!) but I do pick them up as they are released from the vault.  Sarah's gonna have a ball when she's big enough to sit through movies!

Jessica's Questions:

1.  Where would you go if you had an all-expenses paid trip somewhere?  This one is hard as there are so many places I want to see still!  But I'd have to say Norway.  My heritage is heavily Norwegian and I'd love to visit and see that country.  It looks beautiful in pictures!

2.  What do you remember about kindergarten?  There are two things I distinctly remember about kindergarten.  First, that I was put in the wrong class initially and the class I was in did not allow for my daily nap.  I remember losing my cool completely over getting the wrong milk and the next day I was in a different class (I ordered chocolate and received white).  Secondly, I remember playing a silly little game at the water fountains.  There were three drinking spouts attached to a trough and we would sing "Coffee, Tea, Soda Pop, Pee" while pointing to the different spouts.  You did NOT want to get caught drinking out of the "Pee" spout!

3.  Where did you and your spouse go on your first date?  Mike took me to Ted's Montana Grill followed by drinks at Gold Rush and Corner Bar.  We then ended up talking in his car until the wee hours of morning.  We did that a lot our first month dating...

4.  It's 10:30 pm on a weeknight.  What are you doing?  Now that I've had Sarah, you'd find me putting her into her pj's and making her last bottle of the evening.

5.  What did your senior prom dress look like?  It was pretty classic.  It was black, strapless with a fitted bodice and full length A-line skirt.  It had black roses across the top.  I believe I have a picture from prom on my facebook, if so, I'll add it to the end of this post.

6.  If you could instantly be fluent in one language, what would it be?  Probably Italian.  Mainly because that is the language I've come the closest to learning.  Having lived there for almost two years, I was getting ok at speaking it conversationally.

7.  What is the proudest moment of your life?  Before Sarah it was the day I graduated bootcamp.  I felt very privileged and honored to be a part of such a rich tradition.  I couldn't wait to serve my country and I knew it would be a good fit for me.  There's just something about putting on that uniform that makes you stand a little taller.  Now that I've had Sarah, it's easily the moment she was born.  I could not believe how little and perfect she was.  The fact that I have the privilege of being her mom, well I'm pretty proud of that!

8.  Are there any words people say you pronounce funny?  Yes, in high school I got made fun of because I said the word "both" funny.  I'm still not sure exactly how you're supposed to say it...

9.  What do people need to know about you to "really" know you?  First, how to spell my name.  It's JennI (there's no "y" in Jennifer).  Second, that I get really annoyed at smart phones.  I didn't meet up with you to stare at the top of your head because you won't put your phone away.  Occasionally checking the phone is one thing, but having to facebook, check in, twitter, email, text, etc. while visiting with a friend is way too much!!!  Put it on vibrate and tuck it away.  The world won't end because you didn't let your stalkers know exactly where you were and what your doing (end soapbox)

10.  What was your favorite class in college?  Well considering I only completed a year of college before going off to dance for a year.  This narrows my choices, but I'd say English 101.  We wrote a lot of argumentative/persuasive papers in that class, and being a good debater, naturally I excelled.  Present spelling issues aside...

11.  You're craving something salty.  What do you grab?  I don't crave salty very often.  I'm much more of a sweet craving kind of girl... so chips and queso is probably what I'd go for...

If you feel like participating, pretend I tagged you and answer these questions I came up with!

My Own Questions:

1.  Name something on your bucket list.

2.  What is your favorite guilty pleasure food?

3.  What do you do to pamper yourself?
4.  What was your first job?
5.  What is your favorite quote or a quote that really speaks to you?
6.  What color and type of luggage do you use?
7.  If you could choose one super hero power, what would it be?
8.  What is your signature scent (perfume, body spray, your own musk...)?
9.  What website is your biggest time suck?
10.  Tell us about your favorite holiday memory or vacation.
11.  Are you a planner or prefer to only think about now and the next 5 min (I don't know how to phrase this, but you know what I mean ;) )?


What a fun little way to get to know people through blogs.  Thanks Jessica for including me!!

Newborn Photo's 2

Okay, so as promised, here is the follow up to the newborn photo's.  There were a couple I didn't put on facebook because they were a surprise for some family members.

The first couple were for my sister, Kristi, who lives out in California with my beautiful nieces. She crocheted Sarah a beautiful blanket.  So much time and energy went into this blanket that I knew I wanted to get some of her newborn photo's on it.  Here are those shots:

The next photo was taken for my mom who made the dress she is wearing.  Sarah also wore this dress home from the hospital.  It was one of my mom's first attempts at smocking (if not the first) and it is a beautiful little dress.  She almost looked like a doll in these photo's.

I hope you enjoy these few extra shots. It already seems like so long ago that she was that itty bitty, and she's still pretty small!  Time really does fly when you have a baby.  She's a little sweetheart though ~ makes spending time with her so much fun!

I Hope I Never Forget... 3 Months

Sarah,
You're 3 months old today!  I hope I never forget...

• How happy you are when you wake up!  You're very "smiley" when you first wake up.
• Your strength!  You already keep your head level with your body when being pulled to sitting, and often want to continue on to standing.  Happily standing there talking to us while looking around the room.
• The way you love deep voices.  You smile and are genuinely happy when Daddy, Papa, or Muncle Toddy talk to you
• How you squeal and coo at random times.  I think it's just to let us know you're happy :D
• How you "talk" to me everyday when I pick you up. You tell me about all about your day, complete with faces from times when you weren't happy.
• How hard you're working to figure out your hands.  You'll stare at a toy and can get your hand to it every time, but are still figuring out how to wrap your tiny little fingers around it.
• The sweet "huh huh" noise you make followed by a big sigh right before you fall asleep.  I take it as "I love you", and I always respond with "I love you too" (This really is one of my favorite memories at this stage)
• How you really did fit into size 3-6 months, and size 1-2 diapers.  You can still wear both, but we're putting you into size 2 now.
• The way you absolutely love your big sister.  You look for her when you hear her voice and smile every time she plays with you!
• How fast you are growing and changing.  Your hair is now filling in everywhere and getting slightly darker than your white blond newborn hair
• Your cute belly button hernia which makes it look like you have an "outtie"
• How you hate, hate, HATE tummy time.  It breaks both mommy and daddy's heart to make you do it, but we have to for you to get strong!
• That your crying sounds like talking.  You'll stop crying the second you realize we know what the problem is and will whimper just enough for us to know the issue is still present without crying.
• The way your stick that bottom lip out when pouting.  It's the cutest thing!
• How completely in love you are with any moving mobile.  You are happy as a clam laying there watching the hearts and flowers (swing), jungle animals (changing table) or bugs and butterfly's (Gammy's house) go round and round.  You smile like you're the luckiest baby on earth to have something so special.
• You sleep right through crowds and loud area's often with the back of your hand pressed to your forehead, but the second it gets silent or too quiet, you wake up.
• That you NEED skin for comfort.  To have your head against a chest or cheek is your favorite, but will happily settle for a hand if that's all that's available.
• How you grab a hold of shirt collars when falling asleep as if you never want to part from the person holding you.
• The way you think you're invisible when your eating.  When you do make eye contact your eyes get really big like you've been discovered.  It's so funny!
• How you love to play naked for a few minutes after bath time.  You wiggle, smile, and coo until I make you get dressed.
• How you're a night owl like me and daddy.  You stay awake until 11 pm and won't wake up until around 8-8:30 am, usually just for a diaper change and quick meal before sleeping until 10:30-11.
• The way your pat your belly/chest or my hand when your eating
• How you want to see everything and have a hard time settling when there's too much for you to focus on.
• Your awesome baby smell.
• The way you love to kick your legs, especially the left one!

But mostly, baby girl, I hope I never forget to note these things that make you uniquely you.  I love you sooo much and am having so much fun rediscovering the world through your eyes.  I'm incredibly proud to be your mommy!! All my love on your 3 month birthday!

~Mommy

Some pictures of you:

Waking up happy

Sweet Sweet Sarah

How do I work these fingers!?

Hey big sister Haley!

I love your deep voice daddy!

I'm 3 months today!

Newborn Photo's

Wow!  I am so far behind in blogging it's not even funny!!  So many pregnancy blogs that didn't get written, so many newborn posts that didn't get written... Yikes!  Well anyway, here is one post that I can easily do because it doesn't require much thought...

Newborn Photo's!!!

When Sarah was about 2.5 weeks old we took her to get her newborn photo's done.  I can remember freaking out at that point because we'd waited so long and I was concerned that she was getting too big and wouldn't look "newbornish".  For some odd reason, the hospital didn't do any newborn shots of her, so we don't have the hospital puffy faced photo that every baby gets... It blows my brain how quickly she is growing and changing!!!  This Saturday I hope to get her 3 month photo's done.  I have all these idea's for pictures, but I think they may have to wait until 6 months when I can better plan them.  The 3 month shots may be simplified to what I need in order to do her 1st year time line.  Since I'm not good at documentation & photographing, I'm trying my darndest to get the NB, 3M, 6M, 9M, 12M.

Anyways... Here are a few shots from her Newborn Photo Shoot!

One of everyone's favorites!

Cradled in Mommy & Daddy's Hands

Remember this outfit for her coming home!?!

My little flapper baby!

One of my favorites!

These are just a sampling of the photo's we had taken.  There were mulitple shots in all of these outfits or settings, but these are some of our favorites that we didn't order prints. Hmm... you know I took these from my facebook, but there are some missing that I wanted to be a surprise for some family members.  I'll have to do another post with those shots and their stories.  (I will try to remember to actually write it!)  But for now enjoy!!!

Praying for Poop

Yes, you read that title correct!  We have been dealing with some tummy troubles with Sarah for about 2 weeks now.  We've taken her to the doctor numerous times, first it was for acid reflux, then we had to take her because she had it coming out both ends, and not in a good healthy way.  Now we have to take her back because nothing has come out of either end since Saturday morning... Poor little thing, she has no idea what's going on, and really neither do we!

For the reflux, they had us try medicine, then probiotics, then formula change.  The formula change happened right around the time of the stomach bug she caught (if it was a stomach bug, the doctor that day waffled on us the whole time as to what was going on)... so we had to put her on a different formula and give her pedialite. Now she's over that, and this formula seems be ok on her reflux, but it's not moving through her system well... *sigh.  I called the pediatrician yesterday and they had us give her some baby apple prune juice.  Well it didn't work, nor did taking her temperature.  I just want my poor baby to feel better and be functioning.  We'll be seeing her doctor at 2:00 today.

This whole post is probably TMI, but it is our life as of late.  So yes, even though we might complain about diaper explosions, they are welcomed back if they want to make an appearance.  (Which I'm sure is exactly what we'll get when things start moving).  Until then, Mike and I are praying for poop and would appreciate it if you would pray for poop with us!

On an up note, Sarah slept for 6.5 hours night before last, and 7 hours ltst night. Sweet!

And here's a cute picture of Sarah after one of her bathy baths with Auntie Bethany!

Official Mommy Card Earned

I think I just earned my official mommy card.  This week has been "trying" if that's the right word.  Here's a list of things I think you have to experience to earn the title of "mom" or "dad"

1. Several sleepless nights in a row
2. A fussy/inconsolable child for several hours
3. Being thrown up on at close range.
4. Changing you and baby and getting thrown up on again
5. The most massive overflowing poopy diaper
6. Cleaning the clothes/blankets/sheets/people from said poopy diaper.
7. Being pee'd on
8.

Ok, I have to stop right here for a laughing break! This post was inspired by the massive blow out diaper we (I) just cleaned up.  Seriously. How does someone so small and sweet produce so much poo? I'm better at dealing with the grossness than Mike, so I handled the mess once I heard the gagging and exclamations of Mike from the other room.  I cleaned up Sarah first and handed her off to Mike.  Then, I started on the clothes, blankets, and sheets.  No sooner had I got those into the wash and sat down to write this post, than Sarah projectile vomits all over herself, Mike, and the sofa.  Again, I clean the sofa, take Sarah and clean her up while Mike cleans himself.  I sit down with her to soothe her and am patting her back when round 2 of the vomit strikes.  This time it didn't really get on her, just me, so I handed her off to clean myself.... And yes, at that point I just started laughing. Why? Because, this is it.  This is life with a baby! And I wouldn't change a thing.  Sure, it's gross and downright discusting at times.  But when my 5 week old looks at me dead in the eye and smiles with her whole face, it's all the reward I need.

So I'm sure we're headed into another sleepless night because Sarah likes to have a fussy party between 12:30-6:00am. But when she (finally) exhausts herself and falls asleep in my arms to my off pitched wrong lyric lullaby and squeezes my fingers so tight willing me not put her down, it makes my heart grow.  I love her, and she's worth it.  So friends and family, it's not that we don't want to see you, it's that we're passed out in the last grungy t shirt we own praying that the noises we hear from Sarah are just dreams and not her waking up.  And also praying that one of us remembered to clean and sanatize her bottles and pre-measure her formula for the next round when she wakes up.  Yup, it's time for me to get back to the fussy lady as Mike is standing over me singing that he's out of idea's (we take turns trying to do whatever we can think of... what can I say? Team work!)